Friday, March 18, 2011


Integrity. Is integrity a dying quality? I know it is not, but some days the hope runs thin. What is integrity, or how do you define it? Everyday we all have choices to do the right thing. What we do and how we act when no one is watching is the true test of integrity. One of the ways we can see lack of of integrity is through one's words. Interacting with others whose lack of integrity on a daily basis, is truly draining.

We live our lives as an example, whether we want to or not. Someone, somewhere sees our actions and it becomes embedded. That could either be a positive thing or a negative thing, either way, it creates a ripple effect in levels we cant even comprehend.

If one would take a moment to self-evaluate their actions and/or reactions, to consider all perspectives viewing, it would be possible to begin a mindful movement of right-ness. Like the phrase, "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." Unprofessional, inappropriate comments spread like wildfire, and when it is repeated then there are two people making unprofessional, inappropriate comments.

Integrity, saying what needs to be said, without malice. Holding one's tongue when comment or opinion would only cut and damage. Knowing when to speak and when to listen. Knowing that the only true value anyone really has is their word.

When one's very words are corrupt or hold no merit, then how could one even consider establishing a rapport of honor?

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Anyone who angers you conquers you

The world is not evil.

There are evil people. Evil acts. Evil thoughts. But the World is NOT evil.

For one to live in paranoia of something that may happen, is to waste ones life. To shut out people, and live suspiciously is to only breed more distrust, hence more evil.

When violence happens many people get the perspective that 'the world is an evil place', or 'what is this world coming to' and 'I hope I live thru today'. These are all phrases of one who feels they have no control of anything. This isn't true.

We have control of many things. One of the most important things we have control over is our attitude.

Attitude is a choice. This was pointed out to me one day in February 2006, a few minutes before 8 am, I had a dear friend scold me about the lousy, rotten, stinking attitude I had been displaying. "Don't you waste it. Don't you dare waste it. Don't waste your time in in this pity-party attitude. Don't you do that to me."

For any of us to come face to face with tragedy, death or just a really rough day. We have to keep in mind that every moment of our lives is a learning moment worth experiencing.

Part of people's problems is that they hand control of their emotions to others. For example, the phrase, "That asshole really pisses me off" is simply handing yourself over to the other person.

'Anyone who angers you conquers you' is a quote you may want to post. This phrase is so true. To go through your day becoming angry as others so quickly over irrelevant matters is to add evil to the world. Anger is an emotion that stems from ego. And it does no one any good.

I am not saying no one should ever get angry. Anger, in the right context is useful. It can motivate. It can drive ordinary people to do extraordinary things.

But it is also negative when the only emotion one lives in is anger. If your anger is out of control, your ego has a problem and everyone else is pulling your puppet strings.

Take a moment to consider how you react to things. Believe me, the world doesn't revolve around you, so don't take things so personal. If you find yourself angered, step back and ask why? If the answer is 'because that guy is an asshole.' then you may consider your own reaction.... maybe they're thinking the same thing.

Sunday, March 06, 2011

Tragedy. The heart of grief.

I am not certain of how to start this post. The tragedy at West Wendover has ripped me up. It was tough to get out of bed today.

Not only because it has hit so close to home, but because it is a young life, who in one moment has her whole future, and is living carefree and hopeful.

Then violence strikes.

How do we prepare our youth for the future. We don't teach them skills that will keep them debt free by understanding the process of credit cards, percentages in applying it to every day consumerism.
We don't prepare them how to prepare a nutritious meal, or how to plan for a week's menu, nor how to shop, store or budget for it. How many households teach the kids living sharing it with a parent or adult, show their dependents any of this stuff. When those having kids are kids, without these skills how the hell do we expect the offspring to learn what the parent doesn't know?!

Neither does our rural youth know violence. Nor are they prepared. It is known more so than many realize, but when it is predatory is is a foreign concept.

How in the world can a good, young, uninformed person, or even one who has lived a life not affected by violence possibly comprehend predatory violence.

Predator: (n) an animal that naturally preys on others.

Predatory violence is exactly that, simply the hunt for prey. They want resources or they just like the process of the hunt. There is no rational rhyme or reason to those who cannot consider hunting for the kill, another human being.

It's like the spider you squashed, or the deer you got last season. Same indifference, except most people would not ever think of applying this indifference to other people.

There is no answer to "why". It isn't consoling to hear how awful the world and people can be. There is nothing that will give solace to this tragedy. NOTHING..

Except a drive forward to try to educate. Accurate, informative education so that other families don't have to go thru this.

Bullshit information will only set up illusions of safety with out having actual security.

This is not about physical abilities. It is about education and training of how to apply that education.

In a previous post, I mentioned feeling like Neo, who took Morphius' red pill, and realized he was far more into a rabbit hole than he knew he ever wanted to be. With no turning back.

Here I am.

That post was in relation to the violence dynamics training I recently attended.

One cannot unlearn.

Tuesday, March 01, 2011

Controlling the Masses

This is something that I wonder about often. When some kind of situation happens the public freaks out. The media has it's craft down, they realize that violence, death and destruction grabs the public's attention, thus, keeps the public 'tuned in' to their media outlet. It is a vicious cycle and I know that there have been numerous writings about this topic.
The wee hamlet of Wells has had the opportunity to experience public panic of epic proportion within a short period of time. Observing human nature through this has been something else. At times it has reminded me of the musical 'Fiddler on The Roof' with some of the panic and scuttlebutt that is stirred.
This type of propaganda holds a duel responsibility. The media knows it embellishes its reporting, and they know the public eats it up. The media, rather than making the sell, should realize that simply telling the tale would suffice. No speculation, personal opinion or hyperbolizing.
The public, on the other hand must be rational in what it choses to take as fact or as excess. Which may be difficult since we are a nation of excess. It is the 'fear' factor that keeps people so close to the edge of panic. The tiniest bit of 'public menace' or 'disaster' stirs up the embers of ignorance.
The only way way to defeat ignorance is thru education and discipline. If the media didn't have the audience, then it would reconsider how it presents news. But without knowhow of where to gain the knowledge, how does one become educated in such matters?
As the Zen man said, "Nothing is as it seems, nor is it otherwise."
As you listen to news reports, and media reportings, please take into consideration the main goal is to hold your attention, not necessarily giving the whole facts. If they can keep you on their hook, their ratings go up.
A good recommendation: Fear Less by Gavin de Becker.