Saturday, July 02, 2016

No Hope. & No Quitting.

In light of all the 'violence' that is rampant in the world today, you would think that people would like to learn a bit about being better prepared.

Is there more violence? Or is more social media just embellishing how often and how much of it there really is. Humans are the scum of the earth and we relish in other's misery and suffering. Often we like to inflict it ourselves. We would rather blindly follow the foul-tempered windbag that sound confident -or maybe just loudest- who is good at instigating shit, than actually standing up for the dignity of others. 'Tell us what to think, but don't you dare teach us how to think, or worse yet, teach how to - do'.  What happens when you get a community, a nation, full of people who don't know how to think for themselves; who do not know how to 'do' stuff, like sew, cook, read, converse, discuss, learn, care. 

Is there more violence? Or maybe it is just that there are way too many people. Too many humans on the planet. There is only a limited amount of resources available. And at this point we are at the most consumable, throw-away society ever along with begin at the most populated earth ever. Resources consumed, overcrowded congestion... too many people equals more violence. 

Even if it is over-population that helps add to the violence and the all-around social media frenzy of violence feeding... the bottom line is that generally, those who say they want to be better prepared don't even know what to prepare for? Zombies, maybe?

How many times have I heard, "I want to learn, please set up a training." So, I go thru the process of scheduling a date, finding a facility, and getting the word out. Only to have the scheduled training date approach and low and behold, who is NOT present... the one who requested training to begin with. 

Have had even more confirm 'Yep, I gonna do this, I'll be there" and then just before the date.. 'oh, something came up, will do it next time, keep me on the mailing list.' or 'Oh, I've wanted to train with you for years! Can't this time.. again, tho. Keep me informed of future ones." 

I go to my own trainings not only because the people I learn from are genuinely experienced with defense, violence and survival, but because those that also attend get me. The last one came to about $1,200, which was a pretty good price. I stay at scummy hotels and usually skip a meal or two. I go because I want to learn. I go because it is the kind of people that I am most comfortable around. I go because when I am with my training buddies and learning from the instructors, I don't feel like such a freak. Like the sheep dog always on the outskirts of the crowd of sheep that don't really want much to do with me, other than maybe a couple of civil words of greeting and surface conversation, if even that. 

Nothing is more frustrating than having something so valuable to offer, people saying they have concerns and want to learn, but then it always gets put on the back burner. I understand that life happens. I understand emergencies come up, but every damn time?!

I.  Quit.  I quit.  I quit putting my 'teaching' out there for all these people who aren't showing up. I quit the format that obviously does not work. Since no one attended with the current method in which I offer seminars/classes, I am fully capable of adapting. The worse that can happen is the same ol' shit... nothing. The best thing that can happen is that the person looking back at me from the mirror wont be a quitter. I literally can't just walk away from this. Even if I wanted to. Thus, a re-designing of the approach to putting my classes out there. 

So many friends offered their understanding. All of which, know precisely, my frustration. They all offered much needed support and great suggestions. I don't know what I would do without my friends. Wished I lived closer to all of you, but obviously that would be literally everywhere. :)  Good thing there's Facebook.

So, in light of the last frustration melt-down. I am not closing the business. I am not quitting entirely, but rather, readjusting the approach. 

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